I missed the book discussion I was most looking forward to—the Neruda Discussion (1oo Love Sonnets). And in sheer frustration (and sayang na effort), I shall share my favorite poems from said book and why I like them.
Sidenote** First of all, sorry to the mod for missing this. I missed the discussion because I got convinced to do my wisdom tooth extraction on Saturday morning. The dentist told me that I could surf on Sunday after the operation, so I thought, okie dokie—we can do this. But Alas! In the tradition of you not getting everything you want, it turns out I have a gigantic abnormality of a tooth, horizontal and fused to the bone. The 1 hour ½ operation turned into 5 hours and I missed the book discussion. Not to mention the fact that my face looks like I got into a fight and I lost. And the fact that I can’t surf for 2 weeks or more. I need distraction–severe understatement, I think i’m going to finish all the FFP books in 2 weeks. haha! **end of sidenote**
I told someone semi-recently that I believe that people like poems because they relate to it. They can relate to it from something in their past, something in their present, or something they want to be, or always have wanted to be. So people who like creepy poems about taxidermy either like taxidermy, or secretly wishes they were Norman Bates (and yes, I’m talking to you Mr. Dance “Whore”. Haha!)
My favorite sonnets in the 100 Love Sonnets are Sonnets 3 and 66. The ever popular Sonnet 17 is nice, but not my cup of tea.
Harsh love, violet crowned with thorns
a thicket made sharp between so many passions,
spear of pains, corolla of rage,
through what roads and how did you find my soul?
Why did you cast your painful fire,
suddenly, between the cold leaves of my path?
Who taught you the steps that would lead you to me?
What flower, what stone, what smoke revealed my abode?
What’s true is that the frightful night did shiver,
dawn filled all glasses with its wine
and the sun established its celestial presence,
while cruel love surrounded me unrelenting
until piercing me with swords and thorns
it opened my heart a burning path
As my friend marie put it, in a nutshell it meant— I love you, I’m full of angst. Haha! I agree, but the reason I liked this poem is because it reminds me of a Tears for Fears song— Head over Heels. The 2nd stanza talks about being hit by love that you never wanted, nor needed. And you think to yourself, what the hell? Why is this happening? How the hell did it happen? Head over Heels because as the song’s chorus goes “something happens and I’m head over heels, I never find out, til I’m head over heels, don’t break my heart, don’t take my heart, don’t throw it away.”
So I like the poem because at certain points in my life, I can relate to it. Those WTF?! moments wherein you realize you’re a lot deeper than you’ve wanted to be, especially with a person that you don’t know how got into your life in the first place.
SONNET 66: I Do Not Love You Except Because I Love You
I do not love you except because I love you;
I go from loving to not loving you,
From waiting to not waiting for you
My heart moves from cold to fire.
I love you only because it’s you the one I love;
I hate you deeply, and hating you
Bend to you, and the measure of my changing love for you
Is that I do not see you but love you blindly.
Maybe January light will consume
My heart with its cruel
Ray, stealing my key to true calm.
In this part of the story I am the one who
Dies, the only one, and I will die of love because I love you,
Because I love you, Love, in fire and blood.
This one’s a keeper. I love this poem because it reminds me of one of my favorite latin sayings/poem– the catullus 85 about love and hate. (my friends would remember this, because in the throes of dengue, I posted this in FB, haha!)
Odi et amo. Quare id faciam, fortasse requires?
Nescio, sed fiery sentio et excrucior
It roughly translates to:
I hate and I love. Why I do it, perchance you might ask?
I don’t know, but I feel it happening to me and I’m burning up.
Love is weird. But there can be no hate without love and vice versa. In being in love, you have both in very disparate increments, intensity and duration. Haha!
I do not love you except because I love you does explain a lot of shit that has happened to me actually, and to you too probably. Haha! I think if I start a blog about the things you do for love, it would be a hit! haha! (maybe I should.. hmm)
I also think a lot of girls (okay and boys) would relate to this. This is like the poem that’s in your heart when you’re waiting for that someone to ask you out, to call you, or text you. You start hating them for not texting or calling, then they suddenly do. And you reply back, even if you don’t really want to—Bending to their will. Pfft. Then you’re all happy again, which kinda sucks actually. Reminds me of that Love Rollercoaster song by the Red Hot Chili Peppers, okay and that song by Ronan Keating na rin. haha!
But you do it. You do stuff you said to yourself you’d never do, because of le amour. It’s one of those unexplainable things.
In the general/non wholly relating to my life sense, I think the whole poem is talking a little about love that is not balanced. Like the other wanting/loving someone else more than the other. Unrequited love? Could be. But I think it’s more of the former than the latter.
On the other hand, it can also mean a love that is based on fantasies. Yes, like that romance I had with Andrew Keegan a while back, and definitely that wild summer fling I had with Enrique Iglesias. hehe! 🙂
In a nutshell, I liked these poems because 1) they are different and 2) I can relate to them. I hope to God that I can relate to Sonnet 89 someday and to Sonnet 17. Those are good ones.
So those are my favorite sonnets and I really really feel bad about missing the discussion, but at least I feel better.
Here’s a quick ditty to cap off this post (pretty shallow but you know me)
Love is in the air
painkillers in my blood
It’s Valentine’s day
And I sorta look like mud
But it’s okay
the ice cream overflows
I’ve got the handsomest dog
And somebody to hold
The last of which
still begs to be seen
Valentine’s day 2011
Is but an analgesic dream